First let's get some administrative things out of the way. For those of you who are unfamiliar, a TARDIS is a spaceship that looks like a police box that travels through time and space and is from the classic British TV show, Doctor Who. Next, my sister doesn't really like cake but does like rice krispie treats so this "cake" isn't actually a cake. But for the purpose of this blog, I will be referring to it as a cake because "rice krispie treat masterpiece" is way too much to type. Finally, credit must go to this TARDIS cake tutorial because I followed well, some aspects of this tutorial. Some may be generous though. I ignored A LOT of this tutorial because it has insane things like adding a working light to the top of the cake. I was obviously not going to do that. Similarly, I was not going to make a space-themed circular board to put the cake on. A plate will do just fine, thank you very much.
[insert Doctor Who theme here]
So here's the general plan. I found many tutorials online for how to make an excellent TARDIS cake. Almost all of them had cake as a base. As I've already mentioned, I'm not doing that and am making a rice krispie cake instead. So the general structure is for me to make a rice krispie "cake" as a base, cover it in blue modeling chocolate (more on that in a bit), and add the appropriate decorations to make it look like a TARDIS. Simple, right? Agreed.
Fortunately for me, the TARDIS is a rectangle. This made the rice krispie treat part of the project quite easy. All I had to do was make rice krispie treats and then pour the mixture into a very heavily and carefully greased loaf pan. If I recall correctly, I was even clever enough to use a wax paper sling inside the pan so that I could easily lift the rice krispie treat out of the pan. This. Worked. Flawlessly. I cannot emphasize that enough. It was so easy to do and it came out as a very perfect rectangle. I didn't even have to cut the edges or anything. I've never been so proud of making a block of rice krispies.
But as we all know, that wasn't the hard part. The next challenge was making modeling chocolate. I opted to go with modeling chocolate instead of fondant (like I said, I did a lot of research) because I hear it's much easier to work with and it tastes better. I've never worked with fondant so I don't know conclusively but the modeling chocolate was also surprisingly easy. The tutorial linked me to an instructional video on how to make modeling chocolate. I even prepped by watching the video of how many ways modeling chocolate can go wrong! Given my track record with chocolate, I was taking no chances. So ok, melt chocolate (I used white Wilton candy melts), warm up some corn syrup (with the correct combination of food coloring to get TARDIS blue), and fold in with a spatula. This was some workout! I kept a vigilant eye out for white streaks in the chocolate which would mean that I hadn't properly mixed the corn syrup and the chocolate. This was easier than in the video demo because my corn syrup was blue. At the end of the day, it seemed pretty well-mixed to me but wasn't quite perfect. Then I had to let it set overnight. Boo. It really slowed my progress. But I did also use the time to make a much smaller batch of black modeling chocolate. This was not in the tutorial but since I wasn't really following the directions, I was going to need it for some decorations later.
If you think that I finished out my evening by watching an episode of Doctor Who, you'd be...wrong. I went to bed instead.
Next morning! Time to put my decoration and assembly skills to the test!
My handy dandy tutorial wanted me to ice the cake with buttercream before sticking the chocolate on but since I wasn't using real cake, I skipped this step entirely with the logic of "surely chocolate will just stick to rice krispie treats!" And dear readers, I was right! I rolled out my modeling chocolate to exactly 1/8 inch (Just kidding, I have no idea how thick it was but it looked pretty thin to me) and cut it with a big ol' knife and then stuck the pieces onto the four sides and top of my rectangle. I struggled a little bit with the corners and with smoothing it out but modeling chocolate is pretty forgiving and I developed a nice little technique of basically just smoothing it out with my fingers and it didn't look half bad. I'd venture to say it even looked half good!
Now things got really creative because I rolled out a second layer of the chocolate to put exactly on top of the first. Why would I do this? Well, because I'm about to use an x-acto knife to cut out designs. The tutorial wanted me to use a ruler (HAHAHA) and cut out the windows and the panels of the police box. It was actually really simple because once I cut in, it was very easy to peel away just the top blue layer to get a nice 3-D effect. Yes, I'm surprised too. Next, I had to cut thin strips to put on the corners to give it even more dimensions. These got a bit frustrating because I had a tendency of accidentally squishing them out of their long, rectangular shapes. They unfortunately ended up a bit rounded. Plus, I was starting to get a little bit OCD about making things look extremely smooth.
Next we need a roof. To accomplish this, I had to make a pyramid out of the chocolate the exact size of the top of the TARDIS. However, with a rolling pin, even this was manageable! Just start from the middle of a ball of modeling chocolate and then gently going around each of the four sides, keep rolling until you get a pyramid. Cut the edges into a square and then plop it on top. Cool! This project is moving along seamlessly.
Now is the part where they want me to use a real lightbulb in a cake. I'm not that cool. I took my blue modeling chocolate and made a little shape that kind of looks like a lantern and I stuck it on top. I was also instructed to use printable TARDIS decals (not edible) for more of the decorations. I was not going to do this for two reasons: 1) I don't like putting non-edible things on a dessert and 2) that just seems like way too much work. So for the Police Box labels that go around the top, I cut out rectangles of the black modeling chocolate and put them on the top (looking good so far) and got some white writing icing to write POLICE BOX and dear God, I've run out of room. Hmm. Problem. My absolutely brilliant solution to the fact that I just couldn't write that small was to write "POLICE" on one side and then "BOX" on the next side and then repeat. Not perfect. Not an accurate representation of the TARDIS. But at least it's all edible.
Time for some finishing touches! I was supposed to paint in the top windows with black food coloring but I already had a ton of black modeling chocolate so I just pressed that into the spaces instead of painting. And then I was supposed to use white fondant to make the panels of the windows but I didn't have any of that so I just piped with the writing icing. This was...challenging. I'm not so good with piping in that small a space. So the windows ended up a little spike-y. Finally, I had to add the door handle and the police box directions and some other small touches but I just piped all of those on and voila! A TARDIS!
So have I painted a clear enough picture for you? Are you ready to see my exceptional TARDIS? Here it is for your judgement:
Is it just as perfect as I described? It's not at all crazy looking or lumpy, right? Not lopsided either, right? Oh well, to me, it was a solid first attempt at something with some very intricate decorations. I think I'm most proud of the panels in the sides. Those look cool. And it was pretty yummy too! Once we knocked it over and cut slices of rice krispy treats, it was enjoyed by all. Almost like it was bigger on the inside or something.
By the way, for comparison's sake, here's the photo from the tutorial I was following (photo credit: artisancakecompany.com).
Looks exactly the same, right? For those keeping track, two years ago, I made this TARDIS for my sister's birthday and last year I made the panda cupcakes...what do you think this year might bring?
A Disney Moment: Frozen
So guys, Frozen is a pretty loaded topic at this point. If you haven't heard of Frozen, you're either living under a rock or a character in Jane the Virgin. By now, you're probably sick of the pop culture saturation and if you hear "Let It Go" one more time, you might attempt to permanently deafen yourself. But let me take you back. Way back to the week the movie was released. Before it was a phenomenon. Before it was iconic (debatable). And before people got sick of it. That was my experience of Frozen. I saw it during it's opening week with my family and some friends. And I loved it.
First and foremost, the music is awesome. I honestly think "Let It Go" is the weakest song in the entire movie. I laughed really hard at "For the First Time in Forever" and "Love is an Open Door" (seriously, the line "we finish each other's" "SANDWICHES!" made my friend and I turn to each other in the theater and say "Did they just make an Arrested Development reference? Awesome!") and I cried really hard at "Do You Want To Build A Snowman?" Seriously, I can't listen to the last verse of that song. I tear up thinking about it. That whole sequence is first five minutes of Up heartbreaking. I was astounded by Kristen Bell's singing voice. All of the music just jelled for me. And in defense of "Let It Go" I just have to say...they use the word fractals, people. The lyrics are starting to treat people like adults again.
Love Olaf as comic relief. I thought he was just fantastic. And while we technically get a second sidekick, Sven (the reindeer), he doesn't talk so it's fine. But most importantly, the story of the sisters really touched me. Especially near the beginning, I could look at it and see myself with my sister. It just gave me the warm and fuzzies.
All those good things said, the movie suffers from some very real pacing issues. When I rewatched it later, the beginning is still fantastic. I think the movie works up until the point that Elsa zaps Anna in her insane ice castle (kudos to the animators because that thing is beautiful). After that, I completely lose interest. All of the resolution was fun to watch the first time when I didn't know what was going to happen but on rewatches, it doesn't really hold up. The trolls especially seem like a waste of screen time, much as I love "Fixer Upper" as a fun song.
All in all, I think I rate this one a 3/5 in the group. These movies were all really close so it's hard to gauge. But I'll still listen to the soundtrack anytime and will duet with my sister and yes, wanna build a snowman.
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